(no subject)

[bertine]

panic is totally setting in now.

what if i can't get the loan, what if i can't afford this, what if she is trying to screw me, what if i have to walk away from this, what if the assholes that fixed my car did it wrong and it falls apart? what if i bounce some stuff since i have to come earnest money by next thursday and i just had to pay 1000 dollars for my car?

jenni, i am serious how broke i will be for a couple weeks there. i am starting to feel the way i felt before i went back to full time work.

i must breathe

Comments

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

B. It sounds like these things our out of your control.

Yes, take a deep breath. It will be all right!

[bertine.livejournal.com]

i hate things that are out of my control.


i know the exact day i felt like this before: http://www.livejournal.com/users/bertine/72409.html

i remember waking up that morning and bawling my eyes out because I was totally in the hole. I had never been that bad off before. but then two weeks later i had a new job and everything was good.

once i get the purchase agreement with a date to close i'll be ok i think. i just have this fear that they will want an open ended thing while they look for a house but I don't want to have to pay earnest money if that is true.

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

Gee pal. I wish I knew how to talk you down. Just remind yourself that it'll be fine very soon.

As you know, a mortgage is "good debt". I mean, sure, it sucks to owe money, but you get used to it. Sort of. I never forget I owe money. I'm counting down my car loan in my LJ info, fer crissake.

I once had a really bad day when I was doing some math. I was figuring out my monthly costs and I calculated how much it costs me to live. Per hour. DON'T DO THIS!

Yawn! I'm going back to sleep.

[bertine.livejournal.com]

i have done that. figured out how much it costs me per hour.

i also figured out how much i have extra to spend per hour and i tend to judge every thing i buy with home many hours of work that would be.

this mortgage will endup being worth a year and a half of work (at 40 hours a week).

I AM INSANE.

i am felling much better now though, i am thinking it just needs to be less hot.