[personal profile] bertine
I have only once had a Valentine, so I might be just a little bitter about this holiday*. However, here are some articles that are interesting.

Why we kiss

The case for settling for Mr. Good Enough



*Not really, I say I am bitter a lot but really I have a hard time staying bitter at anything.

Mr Good Enough

Date: 2008-02-14 04:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] damncutekitty.livejournal.com
Maybe I am feeling less pressure because I have been married before, but I can't even bring myself to kiss a "Mr Good Enough" (unless you get me drunk), much less have a relationship with one. I get lonely and get to wishing I had "someone", but all it takes is a date or two with someone who is just kinda OK to remind me of what I really want.

I had the big amazing love once before and while that one didn't work out, I'd rather be single forever than settle for anything less. And yes I know that means I am most likely doomed to be single forever. Oh well.

The thing that article doesn't bring up is what about that guy. Mr Kinda OK. Doesn't he deserve to be with someone who realy loves him and thinks he's the bees knees? I would be absolutely mortified if I found out that someone I loved was merely settling for me.

Theres another word for "settling" on the guy who is just kinda OK, just so that you can have the married life. I would say that word is USING. Using some poor, unsuspecting, generally nice guy. And I definitely could never do that.

Re: Mr Good Enough

Date: 2008-02-14 04:28 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bertine.livejournal.com
I have a lot of the same feelings about that article. I can't just settle either.

I think the assumption is that the nice guy would also be settling. That if you don't want to be alone and childless you will just pick someone and make it work. That is great if it was 100 years ago because that is how society was but now I can support myself and live life as I want.

I don't want to get married just because it is the thing to do or because I want to have children. I dated this guy for a few months because I just wanted to settle down and it was just so blah.

Re: Mr Good Enough

Date: 2008-02-14 09:20 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eyelikebigbutts.livejournal.com
why didn't you settle down with that guy? What if he wore a white lab coat to bed and whispered dirty things like natural languages, and syntactic and semantic rules, theories of computation and algarithms in your ear

Re: Mr Good Enough

Date: 2008-02-14 09:23 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bertine.livejournal.com
The guy I sort of dated? Because he was boring and would say things like "I guess I should cuddle you now" which pretty much sums up all the crappiness of that relationship.

The other guy you talk about wouldn't be as boring.

Re: Mr Good Enough

Date: 2008-02-14 09:29 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] eyelikebigbutts.livejournal.com
:( you deserve to be cuddled and have your hair brushed and your feet massaged...

awesome!

Date: 2008-02-14 07:21 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] remembering.livejournal.com
"Emory University primatologist Frans B. M. de Waal recalls a zookeeper who accepted what he thought would be a friendly kiss from one of the bonobos, until he felt the ape’s tongue in his mouth!"

Re: awesome!

Date: 2008-02-15 03:32 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bertine.livejournal.com
I know, that is totally disturbing.

Date: 2008-02-15 03:33 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seattleforge.livejournal.com
I don't understand the folks that are bitter. The grass is always greener, know what I'm sayin'?

Date: 2008-02-15 05:22 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bertine.livejournal.com
I like to pretend to be bitter but really I am pretty darn happy. However, it would be nice to be pretty darn happy and getting some at the same time.

Date: 2008-02-15 05:23 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seattleforge.livejournal.com
HA HA! I agree. I'll let you know if it ever happens for me.

Date: 2008-02-15 05:27 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bertine.livejournal.com
I don't need it all the time, I don't want to get spoiled, just a nice weekend or something.

Tell me, you are my role model. :P

Date: 2008-02-15 05:32 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seattleforge.livejournal.com
I'm trying to remember my last nice weekend...

Date: 2008-02-15 05:34 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bertine.livejournal.com
I am guessing that it involved everyone being gone and the ability to eat anything you wanted and a nice day where you could ride your motorcycle?

Date: 2008-02-15 05:36 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] seattleforge.livejournal.com
OH YAH! You do know me. Cheers, pal.

Date: 2008-02-15 05:39 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] bertine.livejournal.com
Cheers! May you get a weekend of bliss soon!

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