how disturbing

[bertine]

in the break room of my office there are a bunch of men's magazines one of them, esquire has an article about "woman in 2005". i was just in there and i decided to page through the magazine. that section was ripped out.

Comments

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

Esquire? Your place is highbrow. My place had Maxim and FHM. Boo!!!

[bertine.livejournal.com]

lol

i think we have those too. they are informative

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

I know!

Useful topics like "How to pick up at a funeral" "How to spot the woman who carries a condom in her purse."

One of them has a whole column of love advice from Isaac from the Love Boat.

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

how do you spot the woman who carries a condom in her purse?

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

Ya know, I actually don't remember. Maybe it has something to do with the boots. I guess it wasn't that informative after all.

But there are some great photos of Kelly Hu! Yum!

[bertine.livejournal.com]

I carry a couple.

but not my pills, which is dumb.

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

I carry one in my wallet. But the one time I ever needed one, my wallet was in my friends car, across town.

[bertine.livejournal.com]

lol, isn't that the way it is?

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

your mention of that article reminded me to check my condom case. they had expired in may.

whew! disaster averted.

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

Averted? Hellooooooo? You're pregnant with huckfinn's child again.

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

DAMMIT. thanks for reminding me.

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

Today, I did a little research. Yes, this article is actually in the Kelly Hu issue, which is probably why I never remember it.

I'm so dull, I don't even have a stamp collection for anyone to offer to read.

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

hmm. i think if a girl gets to the point where they're making hints THAT obvious, there's some desperation involved.

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

I dunno. I pretty much need a tongue in my ear before I clue in...

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

i go both ways. literally. oh wait! i mean, either i'm absolutely clueless until i'm actually in bed with someone, or i'm the girl who says, 'so are you gonna take me upstairs or should i go home now?'

i couldn't tell you what makes the difference there. i'm not sure myself.

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

One time, I brough a woman home, and I went into the kitchen for some libation. When I came back out she was naked and masturbating. Of course, in my head I was thinking "Hmm... I think this girl make like me. If I play my cards right, I may be able to kiss her tonight".

PS. Not really

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

was her name bertine?

if it was, i don't want to hear about it.

[bertine.livejournal.com]

SHUT UP.

i haven't ever done that

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

i'm actually a fan of the guys who are tactless and say something like, 'so, you want to get naked?' i mean, at least there's no wondering there.

[bertine.livejournal.com]

yeah, that is always nice.

though there is something fun about the wondering.

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

i hate wondering. there are two options: yes and no.

not that i think in absolutes or anything.

[bertine.livejournal.com]

yeah, not at all. :P

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

I prefer, "Well, that shirt's in the way. It must go! The bra, too!"

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

is it wrong to admit i've always been a huge fan of the classic 'that shirt would look great on my bedroom floor'?

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

My favourite is "Are you Irish? Because my penis is dublin!"

Or maybe not.

[f-o-n-y.livejournal.com]

hahaha. how can you lose with that one?

[sacramentalist.livejournal.com]

And here I thought I was getting a clue about how bertine makes a pass.

Drat.

[bertine.livejournal.com]

nah, i am more subtile.

however, usually if you make it to my house you are getting laid.

wait, usually? always.

[bertine.livejournal.com]

YES, it rules.